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👋 Welcome to the 143rd issue of Open Loops, a weekly* letter on clarity, growth, and building a life that feels like yours.
My name is Reza, and every week I sift through 100+ books, articles, podcasts, and way too many tweets to bring you the best in this newsletter.
*Well, almost weekly… The last couple of months have been inconsistent. I've been on the move since November, and the rhythm of this newsletter has been the first thing to wobble. I’ll aim to maintain the weekly cadence going forward. If this is your first time here, welcome!
💭 On my mind
Most changes start before they make sense. First it's a pull you keep noticing, then a thought you keep returning to, then a small impatience with the life that technically works, but deep down feels empty. The practical part of you wants proof before it moves, which is fair. But some changes don't begin as certainty. They begin when the old shape starts taking more energy to defend than the new one takes to imagine.
On presence
I loved this framing of confidence without extraction. You're not trying to get proof from the person in front of you. You're just there, interested and uncollapsed.
Confidence is the capacity to project love, peace and curiosity at once, without effort.
Eurydice's piece on defensiveness is such a useful tell. Not because it makes someone bad, but because it shows where approval is still acting like oxygen. Security is quieter than that. It doesn't need to win every room.
On control
I kept thinking about this codependency passage. Control is care after it loses trust. It tells itself it is protecting the person, the situation, the outcome. But mostly it blocks the one thing that might actually help: everyone having room to move.
Control is an illusion. It doesn't work. People ultimately do what they want to do.
Tyler Denk's almost-sale story of beehiiv gets at the founder version of this. Everyone can be smart and still have different incentives. Sometimes the hardest part is not ignoring advice, but remembering that no one else has to live inside the consequence with you. Worth reading: We almost sold.
On curiosity
I liked Yew Jin's case for protecting some part of your life from usefulness. Spend most of your time on the obvious core, sure. But keep a little room for wandering. The thread with no immediate payoff is often the one that changes the shape of everything later.
The smallest relational gestures are usually the ones that make a door feel open. I liked the image of pebbling: send the article, share the note, tell someone what their work made you notice.
On AI
I've been going deep on building and experimenting with AI: Codex, Claude Code, Cursor, skills, agents, workflow automation. You name it.
My read is that this is bigger than a bubble… Some parts will get silly. Some tools will disappear. But the shift underneath is real: a lot of personal and professional work is about to become more programmable, which means humans get to spend more time on creativity, taste, judgment, and the things only we can bring to the table.
AI still needs direction and validation. I don't think that means there will simply be fewer jobs. I think it means different ones: GTM engineers, AI workflow designers, agent operations leads. The work changes shape.
It's a good time to learn and experiment while the models are still subsidized by very large investments.
If you're trying to automate parts of your work or life and don't know where to start, hit reply. Happy to point you in the right direction.
Also I’m curious…
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📚 From the bookshelf
This week's book is Flow, by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. I keep coming back to the way it reframes happiness: not as ease, but as full engagement with something just hard enough to ask for your whole attention.
A few ideas from the book:
The quality of your life depends on the quality of your attention.
The best moments are often chosen difficulty, not ease.
Flow is easier to enter when the goal is clear, feedback is immediate, and the challenge matches your skill.
Attention is finite, so the best of it has to be protected.
Check out my full bookshelf note on Flow.
Till next time 👋
Should we work together?
This newsletter is where I think out loud each week. The rest of my work is with ambitious people and founders at inflection points: Clarity Coaching for life and career decisions, and GTM advisory for startups that need a sharper story, cleaner strategy, and a launch with more shape. If either feels relevant, we should connect!
Get Foundation 33 for free
Foundation 33 is my curated list of 33 books for clarity, identity, and building a life that feels like yours. Start there if you want a more intentional reading path.
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